REUBEN & TONY It's Tony. Tony Manucci! Open the door! Come sta amico! Buon compleanno! Sessantasette, sessantasette, non è male!

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Transcription:

& shouting from offstage It's Tony. Tony Manucci! Open the door! Reuben laughs and turns the lock to let him in. Tony enters, carrying a large paper bag in one hand and a smaller folded one in the other. He is dressed in an expensive Italian grey silk suit, grey patent leather shoes and a brightly coloured silk tie. Come sta amico! Buon compleanno! Sessantasette, sessantasette, non è male! Auguri! walking back to the living room and turning off the music with the remote Will you stop with the spaghetti talk Tony. Where's my winnings? Hey! I was just wishing you a happy birthday, Reuben. Be nice to me! First we gotta open up the bags. He moves to the dining-room table, places the two bags down and sticks his hand first in the large one, pulling out a large tomato and holding it in the air Ecco! Pomodoro! Just like you asked Reuben. Nice and fresh from my garden. He places the tomato in Reuben's hand. Thank you Tony. now holding out the other hand and motioning with his fingers Now where's the money? Piano! Sempre piano! First we gotta open the other bag. He pulls a casserole of linguine out of the other bag and holds it in the air, grinning proudly From my wife Angela. Some nice linguine. She says you oughta eat more pasta. It's good for the heart. And now the big surprise Reuben! He reaches back in the bag of tomatoes. Reuben's eyes light up

Yeah! How much Tony? What did it pay? pulling out a wine bottle Just what you like, eh Reuben? Barbaresco from my friend Angelo Gaja in Monforte. A nice 1969, sessantanove, just like your birthday. You drink it tonight with the linguine. Tony sits down at one end of the table sitting down at the other end of the table facing Tony Thank you for everything Tony. And thank you to Angela for the linguine. That's very kind. There is a long silence. They both just look at each other. Tony, still grinning and Reuben, now leaning forward in anticipation. So what happened Tony? I missed the 11 o'clock news last night. Took my medicine and I was out like a light by 10.30. How much did the trifecta pay? Hey Reuben, amico! You know how to pick 'em eh! Who told you about that 4 horse? Were you talkin' to the boys? Do I have to talk to anyone? I just knew it. She was due. So what about the 6and 9? No problem Reuben. Your birthday was there. How much Tony? What did the trifecta pay?

Slowly quatro mila duecento cinquanta nuove? calculating Four..thousand.two hundred..and fifty-nine?! Open up that Barbaresco Tony. Right now! rising from the table. He will move around Reuben as if he is on the track as he describes the race Aspetta un momento! First I gotta tell you about the race. Were you there? I was. Went down to the track just for you. So listen. It was exciting! So we're coming up to the 3/4 pole. The 8 horse is leading. The #2's on his outside. But we're okay. They ain't gonna be there when it's over. We talked to the two owners in the barn. They're just boxin' in the favourite, the 5 horse, so he can't go nowhere. Your birthday Reuben? The 6 and 9. They're sittin' along the rail, getting a perfect ride. The #1 horse is long gone. He broke at the paddock turn. We arranged that too. Now we still gotta worry about the #3 horse. But that guy saw us hangin' around the barn too. So we're probably okay. But where's my 4 horse in all this? a little impatiently I was just gonna tell you. She's at the back of the pack. You know just trottin' along takin' in the scenery. So anyway, now we're comin' 'round the final turn and all of a sudden your little bambina goes two wide, and starts blowin' by all of them like a Lamborghini. The 2 horse dies, the #8 breaks. So #5, the favourite is locked in behind them, just like we planned it and your little 4 horse is now sailin' down the lane, four clear lengths ahead of the whole field by this time and still movin' away. The 6 and 9, your birthday, they make their move too and

there we are Reuben, sittin' 1-2-3. So now your guy rears back in the bike and starts laying on the whip. I mean we tell him he's gotta win. So he ain't gonna be happy comin' in second! What'd I tell you Tony. 4-6-9. It was a natural! looking away, then after a long pause 3-6-9 There is another long uncomfortable silence as he turns again and looks at Reuben, shaking his head up and down. 3-6-9 Reuben! Ya see, when your guy leaned back with the whip, about five lengths from the wire, he fell backwards right outa the bike. And the 3 horse came outa nowhere. You're telling me he fell..out of the bike? Ass over backwards. Right there in front of us. Broke both his arms when the 3 horse ran over him. And it paid over four thousand? Oy Oy! Actually it would have paid a lot more if your guy had been there. Your #4 went off at 85 to 1. You woulda probably had the whole trifecta pool..over twentyfive grand. For twenty-five grand it's too bad he didn't break both his legs too!

Don't worry! We can take care of that when he gets outa the hospital if you like. Hey! Look at it this way Reuben. You didn't lose. You still got $16.80 for your show bet on the 6 horse. Tony hands Reuben the money. What's a few grand here or there? You'll hit it next week for sure! Look I gotta go Reuben. My grandson Angelo's gettin' baptized this afternoon. He begins to leave. Reuben is still sitting in a state of shock It's okay! I'll find my way out. And don't forget the linguine and Barbaresco. Happy Birthday Reuben. Ciao!