Hash 2023 otherwise known as the Russian Conspiracy hash, because of the mysterious increase in Russian hashers under the command of this run s supreme hare Doggy Style. HASHMEISTER: Teaboy HARES: Doggy Style VERDICT: Best run since last week s run. Set by the KGB. No Arrows! Smelliest run of the year! Set by KGBeans! SCORE: Based on the stinks. Minus one million stinks. NEW RUNNERS: We have six new runners. Punky is here visiting Pinky. She is staying for two weeks and sure she will run with us again/maybe. Just Pedro is from Venezuela. His favorite farm animal is the tiger (what kind of farm is that?). He is an AD lifer and of course he will run with us again. Just Gala is Just Pedro s wife. She is from Russia. She works as a Chinese translator (KGB) and her favorite farm animal is the cat (KGB cat woman). Just from Nigeria works at a beauty salon and she likes cats too. Anton is another Russian who has been in AD for six years. He works as a consultant (Bullsh*t, Bullsh*t, Sounds Like bullsh*t to me). His favorite farm animal is the dog. Just Ukrainian is another Russian (same, same, but different). She works at THE hotel, (you know the one ). She does not want to run with us again (What!?) and does not have favorite farm animal.
CELEBRATIONS: BIG BANG he is celebrating his sixteenth birthday x 2. RETURNERS: None. HASH SOCIAL: Mainly check out the FB page. On November 5 is a co-ed baby shower/cocktail hour for Glory Hole and Yas Grand Prix. Check FB for details or chat up Hash Social. Also on Nov 4-5, the Gulf Interhash will be held in Muscat. There may or may not be spaces left for this, check the Jebel Hash web page for details. On Friday Nov 18 is the Rehydration Run in the desert near Al Khatim. This is the 10th year of this, so will be even more epic. Cost is Dh200 until October 31 and youʼre guaranteed an event T-shirt. After that, the price is Dh250 and youʼre not guaranteed a shirt. On February 5 and 6, thereʼs the Wadi Bih run, for which weʼll try to field a few teams. There are lots of categories, ranging from five-person teams through to 72km solo. Next week s run will be set by Jack off Daniel on Al Reem island otherwise known as the Black Board. RELIGIOUS ADVISOR: Ozee led the proceedings, calling in Just Katherine to tell us about herself as we are sick of the word. Just Katherine ran the first hash with a yoga mat. She likes yoga and long walks on the beach. She was born in New Jersey and lived most of her life in Texas. Just Catherine used condoms to make beer in the past (rubber condoms as she is vegan). Suggested names: USED CONDOMS ONLY COMES ON A YOGA MAT COME RUBBER WRONG CONDOM Decision will be made at the end of the circle. Next the hare, Ozee, called in Doggy Style to point out the cheerful abundance of Ozee s checks in the trail. Even one of the Ozee s checks was after a normal checkpoint. One Russian out of the circle and all the Russian were called into the circle. Russian joke: I hate Russian dolls because they are so full of themselves. Just Catherine was called in for refusing to scribe (I will never forgive you, J.C.) but she suggested that she would do ANYTHING instead. Three Way was found guilty of driving like an Emirati, storming by our honorable HM. Hello Kitty was brought into the circle after he has been reported to complain about his sore ass, that did not stop him from offering a lap dance for Tea Boy (the power of being HM!). Hello Kitty and Yas were accused of ass grabbing sin.
Doggy Style was back in the circle for getting lost on her own trail. Minder was called in for upgrading the ice chair with a Christmas lights kit and suspicious battery. All the blonde hashers were called in as the RA needed to tell us a couple of blonde jokes. Two blondes walked into a building. You would think at least one of them should saw it. After that Dirty Digger has been heard telling Tea Boy that he should have recognized her with his eyes closed. Lots of services have been offered to our HM tonight, power baby power. Lord Stiffy was called in with everyone else who did not have the privilege to have a down/down tonight for his unreasonable act of spillage. We got back to the serious business of ruining Just Catherine s life and the suggested names are: USED CONDOM ONLY COMES ON YOGA MAT COME RUBBER WRONG CONDOM COMES EARLY AIRPORT CONDOM LADY After a primitive voting legal process USED CONDOM it is!!! ON ON food.