NUWC Golf League Bulletin 1 st Half Week #2 and #3 (Rev 1) 9 May, 2013

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NUWC Golf League Bulletin 1 st Half Week #2 and #3 (Rev 1) 9 May, 2013 Place Team 1 st Half Pts 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 1 5 117.5 40 41 36.5 2 9 117 40 41 36* 3 3 113.5 36* 36 41.5 4 7 108.5 47 31 30.5 5 2 106 34 31 41 6 8 105.5 32 42.5 31 7 4 104.5 32 36 36.5 8 1 102 37 29.5 35.5 9 6 96.5 25 36* 35.5 *Indicates Bye Week. The Bye Week team receives 36 points Birdie (or Better)Report: May 2 May 9 Birdie Report Name Hole Number Cerbarano 5 Albanese 7 T. Velasco 6 Camara 8 Berube 4 Harnois 6 Keller 5 Birdie Report Name Hole Number Corriveau 7 Bertsch 5

WEEKLY LOW SCORES 5/2: LOW GROSS score for THIS WEEK: Jackson (40) LOW NET scores for THIS WEEK: Group Name Team Gross Score Net Score A Gino Cerbarano 1 42 33 B Bob Albanese 8 44 29 C Ray Malone 6 48 30 D Jin Lee Sean Riccio WEEKLY LOW SCORES 5/9: LOW GROSS score for THIS WEEK: Schwab (40) LOW NET scores for THIS WEEK: Group Name Team Gross Score Net Score A Paul Dube 3 42 32 B George Bertsch 3 42 31 C Don Aker 1 46 32 D Jin Lee 3 47 33 3 9 47 50 30 1 st Half LOW SCORES: LOW GROSS score for the FIRST HALF: Fratus (37) LOW NET scores for THE FIRST HALF: Group Name Team Gross Score Net Score A Tim Fratus 9 37 28 B Barbara Keller 7 40 28 C Ray Malone 6 48 30 D Jin Lee Sean Riccio Note: Subs are ineligible for prizes Tim Fratus low gross and low net held for two more weeks as did Barbara Keller s low net. A low net of 28 is going to be tough to beat in the first half. Ray Malone, a C player who subbed in the D group bumped John Perry from the rankings by posting a net 30. The league officials are anticipating a whining email from John Perry since Ray played as a sub. After John hears the ruling that Ray is a regular and is eligible, we then expect a 3 9 47 50 30

Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa email from John! Jin Lee and Sean Riccio made moves to take over the lead in the D group. News First off, I offer my apologies to the league for not getting the Week 2 info out sooner. A combination of scribe miscommunication and web page issues were at fault. The President and web wizard are addressing the issue of accessing the web page at NUWC. You still can access it outside the gates. Once again, NMCI proves its value!!! In the meantime until this is resolved, the Bulletin and scores will be sent out to league distribution. Captains have been provided the sub list and players need to inform their Captains of their availability early for your Captains to find subs. Please have patience regarding this matter. Before the web page was created we handled it this way for years. In Week 2 we saw what could be the demise of Team 7. Team 9 s A squad of Fratus and sub Caldwell beat up on Team 7 s Egan and Harnois 12 to 6 and the Team 9 D squad of Sean Riccio and Ray Malone (regular who subbed this week had to mention this again for Perry) rolled over Team 7 by a score of 13 to 5. Seems Malone was making up for the embarrassing performance the week before versus Team 7. Although his Captain Pete Michno is wondering why he can t put on this type of performance when he plays for his own team ( he also is wondering the same about Nassaney who subbed in week 2 and helped that team by taking 14 points Nassaney was Ray Malone s partner the week before when they got shellacked!)!!! Harnois didn t help Team 7 by shooting a 50!!! And there were two other A players in Freeman and Krzyzek shooting 50 or above. Are they padding their handicaps for a 1 st half run? Also of note was young Taylor Velasco subbing against his father s team. While the squad Taylor was playing for didn t lose by much, they still lost. Could a fix be in???? And for the second week in a row, Hugh Murphy and John Perry rolled over another opponent (Phil Duckett and John Patton that week) this time by a score of 14 to 4. Hugh and John were averaging 13.5 points after two weeks but this would take a turn for the worse in Week 3. In Week 3, of notice were the many no shows. It is suspected that the sub web page being down and the inclement weather probably contributed for most. The ghost of Brian Halpin showed up on the scorecards for the 2 nd week in a row. After 3 weeks, Team 5 has catapulted to the top with Team 9 breathing down their neck and Teams 3 and 1 not far behind. Pete Decoste led the charge by single handedly crushing Marshall Lundberg and Joe Izzi 14.5 to 3.5. Team 7 continued its downward slide by only scoring 30.5 points and not winning a single match. Although, it is very suspicious in that the A division Low Gross/Low Net leader Team 9 s Tim Fratus stunk up the joint with a 46 subbing for Team 7. A total miscalculation by Team 7 s Captain. Team 6 remains at the bottom of the standings. If only Malone and Nassaney could pretend they were subs when they actually play for their own Team, this Team could have a shot. In the weeks Ray and Dave subbed, they shot much better than in other

weeks. This could simply be the results of having a Captain that has no motivational skills! Notes: Captains have been provided the sub list and players need to inform their Captains of their availability early for your Captains to find subs. Captains should call/e-mail the handicapper, Pete Michno, no later than 1100 Thursday to give their lineups. However, I m sure the handicapper would appreciate Captains providing the lineups earlier if you have them set. 1100 on Thursday should be the exception, not the rule. Captains should inform all retirees and non-nuwc members on their teams to use the website for all League information (of course only from outside NUWC presently) or forward on news as appropriate. Scorecards are still being handed in without the gross scores being entered. Please help our handicapper by marking down your scores to save him a little time. Plus you probably don t want to trust his math!!! Dues Even though the dues are listed in the rules, they are repeated here as additional encouragement for you to pay on time! Two weeks before 31 May is preferred!!! League dues for NUWC employees and NUWC retirees will be $40/year, payment received before 31 May 2012. Payment increases to $45.00 if received after 31 May 2012. Dues for NUWC Contractors will be $45/year, payment received before 31 May 2012. Payment increases to $50.00 if received after 31 May 2012. Contractors/Non NUWC employees/retirees are required to pay the additional $5.00 per year to match the Welfare & Recreation subsidy provided for NUWC members. Members are responsible for paying their own dues. Payments can be made to Barbara Keller, Treasurer, to your Team Captain, or to any other League Official. Make checks payable to NUWC Golf League. Cash will also be accepted. Deadline for payments is 31 May. Members who do not pay by the dates indicated are subject to removal as a member and will be placed on the Sub List. Their position on the Team roster will be filled by the next eligible individual on the Sub List based upon membership criteria (frequency of filling in as a sub and handicap with respect to division roster spot needing to be filled). Team Captains are encouraged to ensure all Team Members pay their dues in a timely manner. The League Officers are considering a new rule for 2013 that imposes a reduction in points penalty for any team that has a team member that is delinquent so Captain s should prod any slackers on their teams so we do not have to implement a rule as this.

Slow Play Watch: Not much to report this week as the rain delay slowed things down. In week 2, thought there was an issue with the Team 4 and 3 A groups as I watched from the 1 ST tee but it was later confirmed that there was a John Daly type player in that group and they had to wait to hit to the green. But I must remind you to please read the Pace of Play hints on the webpage which should help you out. Really simple things can shave time off your round. We d rather not be calling people out for slow play in Joke of the Week (Two to make up for last week!) Couldn t Get Over the Water A foursome play golf together regularly at their club, and on the sixth hole, a par four, the second shot to the green must carry 80 yards over water. One of the guys, Mr. Smith, for over a year, could never carry the water, and would always hit into it, totally psyched out by the presence of the water. His friend in the group suggested that he might want to see a hypnotherapist as rumor was that that could be of help in such a situation. So he went to a hypnotherapist for four sessions. In those sessions, he was hypnotized and the therapist would "plant suggestions" that when playing the second shot on the sixth hole, he would not see water, but rather a plush green fairway leading all the way up to the green. About six months later, someone at the club asked whatever happened to Mr. Smith, that he hadn't seen Mr. Smith playing golf at the club for almost four months now. He was informed that five months earlier, Mr. Smith had drowned at the par four sixth! That was my provisional Bill got a call from the coroner, who wants to talk about his wife's recent death. Bill told him the whole sad story. "We were on the third hole. Sally, my wife, was standing on the ladies tee about 30 yards ahead of the men's box when I hit my drive. From the sound when the ball hit her head and the way she dropped like a rock, I knew immediately that she was dead. God only knows where the ball wound up." The coroner replied "That explains the injury to her head, but what about the Titelist embedded in her rectum?" "Oh," said Bill. "That was my provisional." Quote of the Week (Again Two more!) The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. - George Deukmejian Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens. Bob Hope

Golf Cartoon of the Week (Ok You knew two were coming!)

Great Pictures of the Week (Two More!!!)