GHOST MAN ON THIRD WEEK 4 FALL 2010

Transcription

1 GHOST MAN ON THIRD WEEK 4 FALL 2010 WEEK 4 SCORES runs flip cup Balls and Dolls 1 - Kickin Balls Deep 12 - With Another Man s Balls 8 - Vodka Red Balls 1 - Fried Home Runs on a Stick 5 0 Love Juice 2 3 Pitch Please 1 0 Rubber Balls & Liquor 1 3 Kick This 5 3 You re Killing Me Smalls 0 0 Rock Out with your WAKA Out 0 3 TILF 7 2 WEEK 5 MATCH UP Fried Home Runs on a Stick (3-1) Kickin Balls Deep (3-1) Pitch Please (2-1-1) With Another Man s Balls (4-0) Vodka Red Balls (2-2) Rubber Balls & Liquor (1-2-1) Love Juice (0-4) Balls and Dolls (0-4) Rock Out with your WAKA Out (0-4) Kick This (3-1) TILF (4-0) You re Killing Me Smalls (1-3)

2 A WORd FROM YOUR EMPEROR Rantings from our President, Tim S. 5 Facts that make me want to donate to The American Heart Association 1. In a lifetime, the heart pumps about one million barrels of blood Anything worthwhile is measured in barrels. Oil is measured in barrels but more importantly beer is measured in barrels. Now imagine if you could combine the two and contribute to research that could one day let your heart pump millions of barrels of beer instead. That would have been money worth spending. 2. The human heart can create enough pressure that it could squirt blood at a distance of thirty feet. This is just fascinating. I can t think of another way to squirt 30 feet of anything from your body 3. 42% of women who have heart attacks die within 1 year, compared to 24% of men If there were one reason for men to contribute to a worthy cause, that reason would be the decrease in the male to female ratio. Heart disease is one of the most prominent causes of death. In a thousand years there may be no one left but dudes. Think about your descendants futures and help stop the decline! 4. Dick Cheney doesn t have a pulse Yes, its true. Earlier this year some really smart guy attached a pump that spins at 7,000rpm to the left ventricle of Dick Cheney s heart. If you were to feel for a pulse you would morbidly find out that by all technical means, he is dead. Does this also technically make him part human, part cyborg, and part awesome? The answer is yes. 5. Having an orgasm three times a week can cut your risk of coronary heart disease in half. I m gonna have to work on this one.

3 STAndingS Wins Losses Ties Forfits Runs Runs Allowed TILF With Another Man s Balls Kick This Kickin Balls Deep Fried Home Runs on a Stick Pitch Please Vodka Red Balls Rubber Balls & Liquor You re Killing Me Smalls Rock Out with your WAKA Out Balls and Dolls Love Juice Have a Heart, buy a koozie! 100% of proceeds go to the american Heart association $3 each or 2 for $5 available for purchase at the kickball fields.

4 REFS CORnERwith head ref, Andy M. I pity the fools who don t follow the rules! Umpire Blunders If you have watched much baseball this year you have probably heard of the many blown calls by umpires throughout the year. Although unfortunate and the number of missed calls are staggering this year, it just goes to show the human element that goes along with being an umpire. You often have to make the call you feel is correct, even though someone always seems to see it differently. Luckily in kickball our games are not televised, (yet), and we do not have multiple cameras that can track each play to show what may have actually happened. We have to have umpires for kickball and every call you make may not be how someone else saw the play. That s just part of the game. Don t let the fear of making a wrong call prevent you from umpiring a game. Read the rules and PAY ATTENTION and you should be fine. This weeks rule is going off the WAKA book. Because there is no stated rule that covers this we are going to use baseball rules to make the call. If a kicked ball touches the cones that are placed at first and third base lines that ball should be considered a fair ball, the cone s sitting on the foul lines are in fair territory. And one other rule reminder for the week. Rules question??? andymc500@hotmail.com The sideline area is 10 feet outside the first and third base lines. Only spectators, umpires, runners, and fielders may be in this area while the ball is in play.

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6 LAST WEEK S EVIDENCE

7 LAST WEEK S EVIDENCE CONTINUED...

8 AnnOUnCMEnTS SAVE THE date: november 13TH Looking for something to do this Sunday? Want to give back to your community? Have a heart and join us at the Ugly Mug Sunday, 10/17 from noon-4pm for SUNDAY Charity FUNDAY filled with beer Olympics, prize raffles, and bottomless mugs, all in the spirit of raising money for our Fall 2010 charity, American Heart Association. Start gathering your teams of 5 to compete at flip cup, beer pong, and other great bar games. Kickballers and guests are welcome, sign up in advance at kickball on Thursday, and watch your for more information coming soon. Hey kickballers, We re half way through the season and only 5 more weeks until the end-of-season kickball Party on November 13th! Don t forget to mark your calendars and we hope everyone (& your friends) can make it out. We are hard at work finalizing the party details, so watch your in the next few weeks for the eos Party bar and specials. Let us know if you ever have ideas or suggestions for additional social activities. See you next thursday! - amenah & Hill

9 WEEKLY RECAPS Love Juice the Juice is Loose A narrow loss against Home Fries had us all in a tizzy when we realized for a brief period of time during the game that we were ahead. The excitement was enhanced by magic cookies, jello shots and lots of beer. There were some spectacular displays of manhood (i.e. catching the ball) on the part of Eric and Mo. Our own little Kristen had her first ever base run and even made it all the way to home, we are so proud. Most of the team managed to stay vertical for the entire game (Courtney loves to be the exception to every rule) so we will call it a win and move on to legends. A sea of purple shirts swarmed the inner depths of Legend s basement as we prepared ourselves for the next challenge. Tippy cup. After some mild persuasion we managed to get the table up for a little Juice on Juice action. All this practice was futile as our foes Home Fries didn t come to the bar. We felt like stood up prom dates however a win by forfeit isn t going to take the luster off of our participation medals. Team Love Juice takes whatever it can get. You re Killing Me Smalls

10 WEEKLY RECAPS With Another Man s Balls Newcomers,vodka red balls, were the latest victims of With another Man s balls offensive onslaught. WAMB hit the bar before hand to watch the beginning of the Twins game. We then made short work of VRB 8-1 and then rushed back to watch our beloved Twins lose. Highlights include Nick B kicking his first EVER homerun, and solid defense... and much drinking on the field! Kickin Balls Deep Many of our key players were tied up watching the twins lose to the yankees but kickin balls Deep still kicked ass and scored 12 to 1 against bad. Shout-out goes to our guest player, Alexia, who made a double-play by catching an air ball flying towards 2nd base and then tagging out the BAD guy trying to run to 2nd. We rocked it so good the Ref, the captain of ROWO (who stopped Reffing the game after the 4th inning and left), came back and solicited 2 of our girls to play on their team. That s right. Kicking Balls Deep will be kicking balls deeper so stay tuned kids.

11 WEEKLY RECAPS Fried Home Runs on a Stick Come back was the name of the game this week. Love Juice started off strong, staying in the lead at 2-1 until the 5th inning. It was only because of several smart defensive plays that kept LJ to two runs. Offensively, we d apparently been saving everything for a killer last effort. FHR knew they had to deliver, and three solid kicks saw the bases loaded. Allan was up next and earned his Team Captain title by kicking a triple, getting us the runs to take a healthy lead. To pound the proverbial nail in the coffin, Allan stole home the next play, bringing the final score to 5-2. Once again Fried Home Runs on a Stick brought it with style and (according to some) sexiness; putting us in contention for 2nd place for the season so far. Vodka Red Balls Overall, Vodka Red Balls played well under the circumstances. With Nicole out on injured reserve and four other players out sick, the Vodka Red Balls really struggled to beat the undefeated With Another Man s Balls. When asked about the game, Beth from Vodka Red Balls could only say Man it was not a good situation! 8 to like 2. The loss came when Nicole suffered a leg injury from a rough volleyball practice the night before and when Jackie, Dylan, Brad, and John all came down with a newly discovered playoff disease called Twins Fever and were rushed to Target Field and fed plenty of beer to recover for next week s match up against Rubber Balls and Liquor. When October 14th rolls around, Vodka Red Balls should be at full strength to crush their opponent.