SNAIL TRACKS A SNAIL S PACE RUNNING CLUB

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1 SNAIL TRACKS A SNAIL S PACE RUNNING CLUB F O U N T A I N V A L L E Y C H A P T E R JUNE 2012 NEWSLETTER Table of contents: 01-Meeting Minutes 02-Spirit Awards 03-Race Report Types of Runners 10-Races and Places 15-Snails Cup 16-Race Results 18-Treasury 19-Club Races Olympic Gold Joan Benoit winning the 1984 Olympic Women s Marathon 2012 club officers: President: Monet De Jesus mdejesus76@gmail.com Vice President: Luigi Guereca themexicanluge@yahoo.com Treasurer: Robert Mignosa rpmignosa@aol.com Social Chair: Sue Sternberg pezlosue@yahoo.com Newsletter Editor: Frank Chen fightingfalcon@cox.net Club Liaison: Bob Morris Monthly Meeting Minutes : Welcome new members/guests: Marina, Myra, Brenda, Rob, and Amanda. The upcoming club races are Surf City Run 5K on 7/4 (write Snail s Pace on entry form and get $5 off), Pride of the Valley 5K on 8/14, and Long Beach Marathon/Half/5K on 10/7 (write Snail s Pace on entry form and the club gets 10% of entry fees. See Meet-Up website and announcement s for details. Weekly club runs: Tuesday night track workout is now at Fairview Park (Meet at track for warm-up at 6:10 pm and run to park or meet at park for 6:40 pm start). Cameo Shores Run on Sundays at 8:00 am, See Meet-Up website for info and RSVP. Thanks to Bob Norton and Bobby Porter for hosting Ekiden XXI. 48 participated with the highest number of snails attending from all chapters! Saucony has a contest called Find Your Strong through Snail s Pace Facebook page. To enter, you ll need to post a picture of yourself and click on camera icon. Win a trip to Temecula, including hot air balloon ride. OCTC Pancake 5K on 7/29, 8am at Fairview Park. $25 register before 7/15. Next monthly club meeting: 7/11/12 at 7:00 PM (following the 6:15 PM fun run) For informational use only. Not for sales or marketing.

2 Snail's Pace Spirit Incentive Award For this month, Monet De Jesus is the recipient. Every club member can win and there is a new winner every month and year-long. Just go to the web site and register. Snail's Pace Spirit Incentive Program To Participate: You must be a current member of Snail s Pace Running Club and have your dues up to date. Regular club members, Racing Team members and Running Academy Graduates are all eligible to participate and win prizes. Login to and create an account and make sure you are located in your Chapter file (Fountain Valley) and the month you need to post your points. Points are accumulated on a monthly basis and all Chapter events should be posted to the month you participated in them. If you forget to enter your points for a particular month you may go back and enter them, but remember Spirit Points are tabulated on a monthly basis at the end of each month. This addition would only be counted for annual points. How to receive points: Showing up at a regularly scheduled club run 10 points Attending the monthly club meeting 20 points Participating in the monthly club race 20 points Additional Points for wearing the Club Uniform at races 10 points Carpooling to races with other participants (two or more people)-10 points Writing a newsletter article (and having it published) 20 points Hosting a club social event 30 points Attending a club social event 10 points Recruiting new members 10 points Volunteering at a local race 10 points Points are awarded for the activities listed above. Prior to each monthly meeting, the previous month s points will be tabulated and the high scorer will receive a $20.00 ASP gift certificate. You can only win the monthly award once a year thus allowing all a chance at winning. How ever your points are added up and at the end of the year those with the most pints will get more chances at the grand prize drawing of a $ ASP gift certificate, a free membership renewal to the running club, and a free entry to any cub race (limits Apply) of their choice for the next year. All points should be entered no later than the 1st of each month to give the Social Chair time to calculate the winner. If you have any questions, please see your Board of Directors for clarification. 2

3 Races Team Report Laguna Hills Memorial Half Marathon/10K/5K by Bob Morris Talk about the Snail Nation dominating at the LH Memorial Day races, this is the fifth consecutive year A Snail s Pace Race Team members have won both the men s half marathon (Chris Profitt, 1:14:28) and 5K (Jason Valenzuela, 15:15, his 3rd consecutive win). Other top ten men s finishers in the 5K included: 2nd - John Gardiner, 5th Luis Palacios, 6th Jace Hinesly, 9th Sam Blackman, 10th Mark Donaldson. Our women s Race Team was also equally impressive, winning the new 10K (Julie Ertel, 35:53). In the 5K both Leilani Rios and Donna Mills won their age group, Leilani finishing 2nd overall and Donna 5th OA. Other age group winners in the 5K were John, Luis, Mark, Brad Wobig and Dave Schiller. See you at the next club race! 3

4 Ten Types of Runner Which one are you? Written by Roman Mica from Active.com Submitted by Monet De Jesus 1) The Frightened Dog Swatter For some unknown reason the frightened dog swatter usually happens to be a woman who runs as if she were under deadly attack by a hell bent pack of tiny snarling Paris Hilton purse dogs. She flails here legs up and out in a matter and technique designed to swat the little bastard before they can nip and/or sink their tiny teeth into her manicured toenails. She thrust her heels up, out and around with such vicious ferocity that running anywhere within a five foot diameter of her can be deadly to small dogs, squirrels, alligators, vermin, small livestock and of course other petite runners. I believe I've read that the Kenyans and Ethiopians teach their top international runners strategical avoidance classes specifically designed to avoid the frightened dog swatter. 2) The Loud Runner Every-so-often I would jump out of my skin during the race and duck behind the nearest tree or bush in a futile attempt to avoid the elephant stampede I was sure was just a few feet behind me. The Loud Runner is normally a man somewhere between middle age and golden age who's decided that his run will shake the very ground he runs upon. This man must be a titan of industry because his only goal on the run is to subjugate the very road to his enormous will, and he will do so by pounding it into submission with every step he takes. In order to do this he must spring straight into the air like a started cat and pounce on the earth with every ounce of his weight leaving nothing behind but enormous running shoe prints in the crushed and subjected pavement. 4

5 Ten Types of Runner Which one are you? 3) The Human Cybertron I can only assume that the Human Cybertron was once a living and breathing person (either male or female) that at some point in their life due to a horrible tragedy well beyond my comprehension must have had their crucial organs replaced by beeping, buzzing, tweaking, ring tone playing and occasionally clanging cybertronics. To say this runner is a wired machine would do injustice to the amount of wires sporting forth from the typical networked PC. Typically the Human Cybertron runs with every possible electronic aid known to man sprouting from every orifice in their sweaty body. I'm amazed that they can even ponder so much data, with so much entertainment plugged into their ears on such a short run. I mean how much distance, speed, altitude, pace, heart rate, calorie, trajectory, target zone, sweat rate, and MP3 data can a person process in a few short hours? Obviously much more than the Kenyan runner who won the half marathon in 1:05 can process since he did it without any electronic aid outside of a stop watch. 5

6 Ten Types of Runner Which one are you? 4) The Desalination Machine I am most amazed by the Desalination Machine who usually tends to be a woman somewhere between middle age and golden age who has in her lifetime somehow developed the "believe it or not" ability to not sweat. In fact not only does she not sweat, but she's so put together with full make-up and hair that often after the race she'll jump into a cocktail dress and waiting limo to attend this or that red carpet event. To her 13.1 miles or even 26.2 miles of running in the 100 percent humidity of a typical Florida day is nothing to get sweaty about. She can carry on a conversation about her favorite charity or NGO while most of us would be hitting the wall and still have that mysterious clean summer lilac breeze scent waft from every pore of her skin. 5) The Salination Machine Unlike the desalination machine, this slightly portly gentleman started sweating at the pre-race pasta dinner. By the time the race cannon sounds he's already lost 5 pounds of water weight and created enough salt for the Osmond family Thanksgiving dinner. Runners beware! If he decides to shake it up a little, you'll know what's it is like to be next to a very salty, very big, and very wet shaggy dog. The oddest thing about the desalination machine is that you'll rarely, if ever, see him drink anything during the race. At aide stations he shuns both water and sports drinks like an alcoholic after a long, painful, and intense 10 step meeting. Yet somehow he manages to sweat like Britney Spears at a Baptist breakfast prayer meeting after an all night pantyless party...even well after he crosses the finish line. 6

7 Ten Types of Runner Which one are you? 6) The High Five Twister For some unknown reason to me, the High Five Twister is usually a cute and youngish female runner who looks like she wants to high five every other runner that passes her. Typically her elbows are at about (let's call it ear level) and she twists her body 180 degrees with every step she takes. Honestly, it hurts just to watch the High Five Twister run. But not her. Even though she contorts her spine into the begins of a DNA double helix strand, you'd never know it by the huge smile on her face. So yes, while her twisting body rotation and her high elbows create little micro tornadoes along the course, her winning smile and happy attitude says, "I'd win this race if it were only measured by the distance traveled from side to side, instead of straight ahead." 7) The Stink Bomber Sometimes the pre-race morning meal does not agree with the body in motion. I'm sure in the heat of battle we've all squeezed out a little "poot". But not the Stink Bomber. This guy started farting at the age of one and has since gone to graduate school in the fine art of flatulence. He's a running toxic obstacle to be avoided at all cost. But the problem is that on the typical crowded marathon course you don't know who he is until it is way too late. By the time you are even aware of the danger, you have been skunked and often you can't even tell who "did it." Even when you can tell who "did it", you are too focused on trying to just cross the finish line. Beware: The Stink Bomber is well aware of this fact and he'll use it to spread even more stink bombs along the entire course. 7

8 Ten Types of Runner Which one are you? 8) The NBA Pro Every-so-often a runner is born, and at a tragic and early age his brain gets frazzled, usually by a direct hit to head from a misguided basketball, into making him believe that he is in fact not a runner, but an NBA Pro. Fortunately, these guys, and sometimes even gals, are easy to spot by their uniforms. They tend to favor wearing the full NBA gear over their running gear. Because of this early and tragic childhood accident, they always wear the long basketball shorts over their running shorts. This is indeed very sad to observe as the basketball shorts hang way down. They hang so far down that they cover their knees, making running a marathon an especially daunting and painful endeavor. However, on several occasions, like this recent race which was an out and back run along the same road, I have seen a miraculous confluence of events that can only bring pure joy to one's heart. You see on that rare occasion that the NBA pro passes the High Five Twister, both are in their most natural of elements as one high fives the other in a spectacular show of lucky coincidence. 9) Doctor Doctor is almost always a women of that certain age (read well above 30) who has the slender hips of a 15-year-old (I suspect from all of that running) but the enhanced big boobs of a Hollywood Starlet wanna-be. She is usually observed wearing only a sports bra/top with not much else hiding her helium filled boobs. I can only guess that she asked her plastic surgeon to fill them to the brim with 400 cc of helium as her boobs defy gravity, the up and down motion of running, and even time itself. When one observes closely it can almost be imaged that her buoyant bosoms, and not her, are running the race. They, and not (let's say) her legs, are the pride and joy of her well worked over body and she wants the entire world to know. After all, she paid almost $10,100 to run this race ($100 for the race entry fee and $5000 per boob). 8

9 Ten Types of Runner Which one are you? 10) The Gazelle and the Sloth These two animals are almost never seen together in the wild, but you'll see them at every marathon, in every city of the world. Somehow they strangely complement each other. They are the yin and yang of the running world. The Gazelle boldly bounds straight up into the air with every springy step. Image Michael Jordon on cocaine, steroids and with a bee in his shorts. The Sloth shuffles along lifting his or her feet about an ant's toenail length above the ground. BTW: Do ants even have toenails? Anyway, the Sloth manages to use just enough energy to slide his or her leg forward to make forward progress. And here's where the most incredible miracle of all marathons takes place. Some call it divine intervention and see God's wry sense of humor, while others point to the shadow of Darwin and millennium of evolution at play. But this does not take away in the slightest from the Miracle of the Marathon: as both the Gazelle and the Sloth cross the finish line in the exact same time. 9

10 Races and Places with Snails EKIDEN XXI 10

11 Races and Places with Snails EKIDEN XXI 11

12 Races and Places with Snails EKIDEN XXI 12

13 Races and Places with Snails 2012 Laguna Hills Half Marathon Awesome Snail s Pacers 13

14 Races and Places with Snails 2012 Downtown Anaheim 5K Patty Zambarano, Christian Fairing (2nd place in her division), Monet DeJesus 14

15 Snails Cup Update For a listing of the full results, click here: Snails Cup May 2012 Name Chapter Total Races Total Points Gloria Rendon-Thomas LH Grace Innis LH Sheri Corlett LH Greg Beck LH Craig Innis LH Faith Morris LH Denise Bacher BR Shawn Ferrando LH Elaine Gronberg LH Pat Herr LH Keven Williams BR Monet De Jesus FV Bret Van Horne LH Oscar Huerta BR Teri Styles LH Tanya Mansel LH Tina Ingegneri LH Mike Strange BR Tom Frost LH Meleah Shank LH

16 Race Results Name Time Comments Laguna Hills Half Marathon Bob Norton 2:07:12 1 st Div. Best ½ in 2012 Leisa Gac 2:18:00 Lost Bob Anaheim 5K Sue Sternberg 0:25:06 PR! Thanks Paul! Sandy Draper Tasmin Warner First 5K Magic Shoe 5K Bob Norton 0:26:46 3 rd Div Bobby Porter 0:23:00 Pulled muscle in calf RNR San Diego Marathon Bryan Solis 3:48:00 Back to back marathon Marina White 6:08:00 Camp Pendleton Mud Run 10K Robert Sternberg 1:08:00 Personal best in the mud! Myra Kuck I finished OC Half Marathon Suzan Hall 1:45:00 2 nd half ever! New PR woohoo! Myra Kuck 2:37:00 Brenda Rollins 2:55:00 (P.R.) Corona Del Mar 5K Ian Farrell 0:20:11 Renee Baker Love, Love, Love this race Descanso Ride & Tie Long Course Rick Noer With Jennifer Monioz 5 th Place Jennifer Monioz 3:55:00 With Rick Noer 5 th Pl & best condition horse 16

17 Race Results Name Time Comments Other Races Rick Noer 0:55:00 Claremont 10K 1 st A/G Rick Noer 0:58:00 Breezing through Beaumont 3/AG Ian Farrell 3:00+ Fiesta Metric Century 60.2 mile Cycling Race James Flaherty 3:28:57 Ojai to Ocean Marathon PR by 2:00, Boston Qualified, very fast course Bridget O Callaghan Hay 4:47:00 WI Kenosha Marathon Great course along Lake Michigan Bridget O Callaghan Hay 5:03:00 Kalamazoo Michigan Marathon Hilly but great run. Day 2 of Double Amanda Slate 0:41:00 Pats Run 4.2 mi In honor of Pat Tillman Sue Rudolph 3:23:00 Holcomb Valley 15 mile Trail Run 2 nd AG Beautiful run Madeline Ramirez 0:00:36 P.A.L. Track Meet 200m 9 th place Madeline Ramirez 0:05:33 P.A.L. Track Meet 4x400m Relay 2 nd place Nam Ngo 0:21:23 Boeing 5K (May) 5 th out of 45 Nam Ngo 0:20:45 Boeing 5K (June) 5 th OA Brenda Rollins 3:03:00 RNR San Diego Half Marathon Bryan Solis 1:23:00 Fontana Half Marathon 2 nd in Div & New York Qual. Kim Rojas 2:40:00 OC Tri 3 rd Place AG Sandy Draper 0:48:16 Wrigley River 10K 2 nd AG 17

18 Treasury Report & Membership Update June 2012 Balance as of 5/9/12 $1, May Dues + $ Kim Rojas Entry Award - $50.00 S.P. Incentive Winner for May - $20.00 Club Meeting Food 6/13/12 - $ Balance as of 6/13/12 $1, The following memberships have expired: David Calvert Tatiana Freitas Rick Noer Leisa Salvo-Gac Thanks to the following members paid their dues in May: Dave Rios Nick Duarte Ian Farrell Bill Jay Jason Valenzuela Justin Huynh The following memberships are due to be renewed in June: Chrys Chrys Jeff Collins Johnathan Diaz Stephan Erickson Bonnie Lytle Kate Stack Total active members: 91 18

19 Club Races & Runs F o u n t a i n V a l l e y L a g u n a H i l l s B r e a M o n r o v i a ALL Races and Dates are tentative, and subject to revision. suggestions for additional Club Races to: Bob.Morris@aSnailsPace.net Chapter Sponsor Date Race Location FV July 4 HB Surf City 5K Huntington Beach MO August 4 Pride of the Valley 5K Baldwin Park FV October 7 Long Beach Marathon/Half/5K Long Beach FV October 21 Surf City Beach Derby 10mi/10K Huntington Beach LH November 22 Dana Point Turkey Trot 10K/5K Dana Point MO December Tiger Run 5K/10K South Pasadena Tuesday Track Workouts with Coach Dave Fier Orange Coast College Track & Field 2701 Fairview Rd., Costa Mesa, CA Warm up may start ~6:00 PM, ready to run between your current Marathon to 5K race 6:30 PM. Every Tuesday night: intervals, tempo runs, hills, depending on season. Always fun, sometimes breath taking, lung aching, legs shaking, yet always fun, fun, fun! Wednesday Night Fun Runs Meet at the Round Table Pizza Parking Lot (Euclid / Warner) Warner Ave., Fountain Valley, CA Fun Run: 4 miles, less or further. Run 6:15 PM sharp or even earlier if you like. FC