A compass card with 69 cents on it. A 400 square foot apartment that rents for $2000 a month. A $15 minimum wage.

Transcription

1 A $15 minimum wage. A 400 square foot apartment that rents for $2000 a month. A 50 year-old roller coaster made of wood. A compass card with 69 cents on it. A downward dog that ends up in doggie style. A hipster beard, suspenders, and ironic glasses. A kale smoothie enema. A Lambo with an N sign.

2 A one-way ticket to Hope. A serious lack of glutenfree options. A shirtless Justin Trudeau. A threesome with Ryan Reynolds and Seth Rogen. Actually snowboarding and going to the beach in one day. An overwhelming sense of anxiety when driving through the Massey Tunnel. BACK DOOR! Being an anarchist and not really understanding why.

3 Bjossa, the Killer Whale. Brunch that is just mimosas, and the mimosas are just champagne, and the champagne is really vodka. Bryant Big Country Reeves. Camping out at YVR. Canuck the Crow. Cold Yoga. Confidently maintaining eye-contact with strangers on public transit. Constantly talking about past, present and future weather.

4 Dispensaries on every corner. Double fisting that sweet Chilliwack corn. Eating vegans. Embracing the rain. Empty Condos. Evangeline Lilly. Finally calling Carly Rae Jepsen. Finding something to be offended about.

5 Finding your soulmate at Wreck Beach. Gassy Jack. Gentrifying Chinatown. Going to the Bellingham Costco and buying all the milk. Having an opinion about Bike Lanes. Ian Handsomemanthing. Invisible Yoga Pants. Jogging around the seawall with your child in a stroller.

6 Jumping off the Canucks Bandwagon and breaking both legs. Jumping up and down on the suspension bridge. Leaky condos. Leaving the Car-2-Go on Boundary and walking home to Coquitlam. Letting your Freak Flag fly. Main Street Moustache Rides. Missing the last Seabus and having to swim. Nardwuar the Human Serviette.

7 Never leaving Kitsilano. A Nooner at the Nat. Not being able to tap out and dying of hunger at Joyce-Collingwood. Only using the art gallery on 4/20. Organic, free-trade vinyl records. Pretending that the Olympics didn t happen. Pretending to give a shit about the environment. Proudly being from Surrey.

8 Sewing a maple leaf patch onto your backpack. Sharing a micro-suite with your disappointed parents. Shutting down a bridge to do yoga. Standing on the left side of an escalator like an animal. Sympathy for the rest of Canada and their Winters. Taking an Evo on a crosscountry road trip. The Fictionals! The glorious Bike Lane Revolution of 2018.

9 The kidney I sold to pay rent. The place where Skytrains go at night. The Steam Clock. The sweat of Chad Kroeger. Throwing up on Granville Street. Trying to get on SkyTrain before anyone gets off despite the giant sticker right in front of you saying not to. Two Inches of Snow. Two seagulls fighting over a hotdog.

10 Wishing the Green Men would come watch your road hockey game. Wonder Twins Powers with Daniel and Henrik. You, your friends, and that craft brewery you re never going to start. Your local community grow op. An internship that actually pays. Getting beat up by a flock of Canadian Geese. Nodding your head when the unceded territories are mentioned as though you know what any of it means. Waiting under a clamshell for Raven to find you.

11 Yet another bar trying to look classy with black and chrome. Not thanking the bus driver when you disembark and feeling crappy about it for the rest of the day.

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