This is it! Come out Monday to watch the pantless Ball N Dolls take on the powerhouse Pitch, Please! CA Hollywood Division Spring 2010 Week Ten

Transcription

1 CA Hollywood Division Spring 2010 Week Ten This is it! Come out Monday to watch the pantless Ball N Dolls take on the powerhouse Pitch, Please! Then stick around to cheer on your All-Stars!

2 What s Inside Week Ten issue 3 Schedule 4 Playoff Bracket 5 Spring 2010 All-Stars 6 League Award Nominees 7 Green Screen Photos Coming 8 Founder s Cup Info 9 Hugh Winterbottom s Picks 10 Team Pages Editor s note: Yes, some of these are from last week...i didn t have my camera, sorry.

3 schedule Throbbin Hood (prince of Beaves) division Pitch, Please! (PP) The Ron Burgundies (RB) Multiple Scorgasms (MS) Alpha Beta (AB) Big trouble in little vagina division Balls N Dolls (BND) Suck My Kick! (SMK) Who Let the Balls Out (WLBO) Roid Rage (RR) honey i blew everyone division Little Lebowski (LL) Annexation of Puerto Rico (APR) Pussyfooters (PF) Faceballs (FB) a clockwork orgy division Ponies of Death (POD) Ballsheviks (BALL) Gym Class Dropouts (GCD) Hold My Beer & Watch This (HMB) 7:30 Field #1 - Championship Game PP - BND 8:45 Field #1 - All-Star Game BCOT - HIBETH REFS: Brandon Hall, Bryan Crocker, Greg Fish and Paddy Culham

4 WAKA HOLLYWOOD PLAYOFFS - SPRING 2010 FIRST ROUND JULY 26TH QUARTERFINALS AUGUST 2ND SEMIFINALS AUGUST 2ND CHAMPIONSHIP AUGUST 9TH SEMIFINALS AUGUST 2ND QUARTERFINALS AUGUST 2ND FIRST ROUND JULY 26TH 1 Suck My Kick Pitch, Please! 2 Suck My Kick 13 Pussyfooters 0 1 Suck My Kick Pitch, Please! 2 Pitch, Please! 12 Gym Class 0 16 PussyFooters 8 Ron Burgundies Alpha Betas 3 Ron Burgundies 0 Suck My Kick 4 Alpha Beta 1 9 Alpha Beta 1 Suck My Kick Spring 2010 Hollywood Champion Pitch, Please! Pitch, Please! 2 Pitch, Please! 3 Little Lebowskis 0 Little Lebowskis 10 Gym Class Dropouts 15 Ponies of Death 7 Little Lebowskis 1 Ponies of Death 0 9 Alpha Beta Balls N Dolls 4 Suck My Kick 3 Championship Game Monday, August 9th 7:45 Field 1 Pitch, Please! 5 Faceballs 1 Little Lebowskis 10 4 Ballsheviks Faceballs 3 Who Let Balls Out 6 Ballsheviks 4 13 Who Let the Balls Out Balls N Dolls Faceballs 3 Faceballs 2 Scorgasms 1 13 Who Let the Balls Out 5 Balls N Dolls Balls N Dolls 5 Who Let Balls Out 0 5 Balls N Dolls Faceballs 3 Faceballs 1 Annexation of PR 0 Multliple Scorgams 14 Annexation of PR 6 Balls N Dolls 12 Hold My Beer 0 5 Balls N Dolls Annexation of PR 6 Annexation of PR 7 Roid Rage 1 12 Hold My Beer Roid Rage 11

5 Hollywood spring 2010 all-stars! Big Clockwork Orgy Trouble David Binns (SMK) Nicole Nogueras (SMK) Chris Klein (SMK)* Whit Hansen (BALL) Jill Hoffmeister (BALL) Padraic Culham (BALL)* Enrique Gonzalez (BND) Deana Duvall (BND) Rollo Girando (WLBO) Carinne Uslar (WLBO) Mike Gifford (RR) Brenda Colden (RR) Brad McLaughlin (POD) Allison Sappienza (POD) Jeremy Smith (GCD) Tatiana Tensen (GCD) Brent McElveen (HMB) Jenna Reynolds (HMB) Honey I Blew Everyone s Throbbin Hood Kevin Campbell (PP) Becky Bilbrey (PP) Matt Bransby (PP)* Zachary Fishbain (FB) Victoria Welch (FB) Robert Radwill (FB)* Mike Erwin (RB) Sasha Nagy (RB) Ryan Causey (MS) Sarah Layland (MS) Nate Hoeft (LL) Brandie Tucker (LL) Bryan Crocker (APR) Rowie Wolf (APR) Danny Herman (PF) Chasidy Atchison (PF) Brianna Hill (AB) Danny Beardsworth (AB) *Captain s Choice The All-Star game will take place on Monday August 9th, immediately following the Championship game. Come out and cheer on your All-stars!!

6 Hollywood 2010 spring award nominees Male MVP Chris Klein (SMK) Dave Binns (SMK) Kevin Campbell (PP) Matt Bransby (PP) Whit Hansen (BALL) Female MVP Becky Bilbrey (PP) Kimberly Richey (APR) Nicole Nogueras (SMK) Rowie Wolf (APR) Cy Young Dave Binns (SMK) Kevin Campbell (PP) Best Rookie Team Alpha Beta Faceballs Best Sportsmanship Hold My Beer Multiple Scorgasms Zebra (best ref) Casey McAdams (POD) Jason Benoit (BND) Kevin Campbell (PP) Winners will be announced between the Championship and All-Star Games so make sure to come out and get your trophy! Best KIR Page Ballsheviks Ponies of Death Pussyfooters Annexation of Puerto Rico

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8 Will you join WAKA at Founders Cup Weekend? WAKA has reinvented Founders Cup Weekend this year to bring even more teams together for competition and fun! It s so new and exciting that you ll have to see it to believe it...and that s exactly what you have the chance to do! Here s how you can join the party: n Founders Cup tournament teams will be invited the week of August 16th. Details will be coming soon so please stay tuned. If you d like information about qualifying for Founders Cup, please see the eligibility guidelines at n Applications are now available for The Kickball Games. Grab your friends, put on your best costumes, and come play in this fun, social round robin. Prizes will be awarded in 5 superlative categories! Get your application at and apply before JULY 14th. n Become a Certified Tournament Referee! CTRs get paid to referee during the Founders Cup and Kickball Games. If you are interested in learning more about this opportunity, please tournaments@kickball.com. n Become a volunteer. Volunteers get to see Founders Cup Weekend behind the scenes and do a great service to other players by helping WAKA do bigger and better things at the event. If you are interested in volunteering during the weekend, please tournaments@kickball.com.

9 Hugh Winterbottom championship prediction Balls n Dolls vs. Pitch, Please! After Monday night s whirlwind of kickball action, Hugh had to hit up his local CVS for an entire pack of chewable Pepto cause Hugh was literally shitting himself over all the awesomeness that his doey-brown eyes had just witnessed. Down by 3 with 2 outs and the pink team STILL manages to find a way to win? Are you kidding, Hugh?!? That s top three in Hugh s all-time greatest kickball games ever played. But should anyone really be surprised? This is still a core team from five seasons ago that took the undefeated (not just in a season, but ALL-TIME undefeated) Sofa King team to overtime in the semi-finals of the playoffs. A pink team that rivaled only the Pussyfooters in their putridness (see: Hugh s underwear from last week). Someone suggested to Hugh we start calling these guys and gals the Cardiac Kids after their game against Suck My Kick. Call em whatever you want, Hugh s just stoked he gets to see more pantsless kickball! As for Pitch, Please!... Is anyone really surprised to see the white, puke green, and/or now gold team here again? While they came into the league around the same time as BnD, they are an unique beast unto themselves. While they may still feel the constriction that a pair of pants brings to athletic conquests, they ve themselves are not without ritual. One, nut hugging softball pants. Two, foreigners. Three, the infamous El Diablo. And four (and most importantly), that old man from the Five Hour Energy Commercials. These two teams have a competitive history. A few seasons back, BnD ruined a PP undefeated season, only to be toppled by them in the playoffs. This season PP manhandled the pink squad in their regular season contest. Do we see a trend? Obviously the aforementioned facts seem to weigh heavily in PP s favor... But this is the PLAYOFFS! Logic doesn t always prevail in the PLAYOFFS!!! Hugh hasn t had this much trouble deciding on a winner since that time he was offered to judge a Hooters Wet T-Shirt Contest in college. So many boobs. So many asses. So many wet t-shirts. But then again, are there really any losers in a wet t-shirt contest?!?... That s what Hugh thought. Last week Hugh went with his on-again, off-again girlfriend Tammy for some prognostication. But for a game of this magnitude, Hugh couldn t rely on the lesser sex... Therefore, Hugh pulled something out of his bag of tricks that he swore he would never try again. A little history lesson... Hugh used to work on Wall Street. Hugh made lots of dough. Then Hugh discovered a little something called meth (heyo Lindsay Lohan), hookers (heyo Lindsay Lohan, again) and Two Buck Chuck (heyo, lame hipsters). Hugh was no longer rolling in the dough. Why is this important? Because Hugh discovered something working late at the office one night. He could predict stocks like that chick in MEAN GIRLS could predict it was raining because her nipples were hard... That s right, Hugh has magical jerk off juice. So what did Hugh do? Hugh set up two pictures across his cardboard box domicile last night: one of Ryan Bilbrey (Pitch, Please! Captain and one-third of the league s Presidential Triad) next to a picture of Colin Whitman posing in his skivvies, looking all 12 year old sexy. Then, he closed his eyes and rubbed one out, until... BOOM!! Bull s-eye!!! All over Mr. Bilbrey s right eyeball. What s the lesson to be learned here? It s that Hugh s spunk never lies. Pick: Pitch, Please! for the win... And a second consecutive trip to Las Vegas.

10 Thanks Pussies for an Outstanding season! Congrats to our rookie allstars Chasidy Atchison Danny Herman KC Norman I am the Paul Bunyon of the Kickball filed, the ball looks like a marble when I hold it in my hand, my pitches are so fast the refs can t even see them. And when I spread my arms there isn t a ball that gets past me. I look intimidating, yes I know, but don t you little ladies worry about that, I am a Pussy through and through. Katie Enright I am little spitfire on an off the field don t let my innocent looks fool you. My favorite position is 3rd base coach cause I like watching big men run for their lives when I motion them to go all the way. If you think you have what it takes, you know where to find me, I ll be the girl at the bar always looking for a double play. Samir Chowdhury I love balls in my face. I try every game to have my face be in contact with a big luscious red rubber ball. There are no words to describe the way I feel when the somewhat sandy rubber grates against my cheek, or the way the impact of a ball kicked into my face makes my nose feel like it will smash into the back of my skull. And nothing beats the euphoric high of shame when I reopen my eyes to see the mix of laughter and embarrassment on my teammates faces as they watch me embrace yet another ball with my face. although i don't use my hands i am truly a catch.

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13 Pitch, Please! Defeats Little Lebowski (3 0) and Faceballs (5 1) to earn its third straight trip to the finals. It s Championship Time! How they done it: