GHOST MAN ON THIRD FLORIDA STINGRAY DIVISION FALL 2013 ISSUE 5

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1 GHOST MAN ON THIRD FLORIDA STINGRAY DIVISION FALL 2013 ISSUE 5

2 STUFF TO KNOW THE RULES Our playing fields are run by the City so we need to pay close attention to their rules to ensure we will have fields to play on for the season. Pets: Pets are not allowed at the park. Please make plans to keep your pets at home or we will have to ask you and your pet to leave. Beverages: Alcoholic beverage containers are not allowed at the park at any time, this includes the fields & parking lots. No glass containers or bottles of any kind are allowed on the fields. Coolers, Funnels, Kegs and Party Balls or anything that seems fun are not allowed on the fields. You are required to keep all beverages in bubba kegs, thermos bottles, solo cups, or anything that cannot be seen through. Clear colored or see through cups are not allowed, please purchase solid colored solo cups. Anyone in violation of the beverage policy will be asked to leave the premises and may be suspended for the remainder of the season. Please do not be the guy/gal walking in with a case of beer wrapped in a plastic bag or something. That is NOT ok. GMOT STAFF WAKA STINGRAY Division Customer Service Rep: Corey MF Myers CONTENTS PAGE RULES 2 FIELDS INFO 3 WEEK 4 RESULTS 4 WEEK 5 SCHEDULE 5 POWER RANKINGS 6 THEMES AND INFO 7 WEEK 4 HIGHLIGHTS 8 SPOTLIGHTS! VET OF THE WEEK ROOKIE OF THE WEEK 9 10 AFTER PARTY INFO 11 Other Activities: Due to general safety and liability reasons; no other sports may be played at a WAKA permitted field just prior to or during the games. That means no tossing a football around or kicking a soccer ball etc. Fireworks: Absolutely no fireworks of any kind are allowed on or near our fields. That includes Sparklers, Flame throwers, Molotov Cocktails and anything else you can think of. Trash: All trash must be picked up before you leave the field. Trash cans are available throughout the park. Rest Rooms: Patton Park has two restrooms at the front of the field, use them. Do not use the caveman method and do your business in bushes or even worse in the open. You may get a ticket and we may lose the permit to use the park! Parking: Park only in marked spaces or areas designated by the park. Parking on roads, on the curb, or on the sidewalk in unmarked spots may result in a parking ticket.

3 THE FIELDS UPDATED!!!

4 WEEK 4 RESULTS

5 WEEK 5 SCHEDULE

6 POWER RANKINGS 1. Dream Crushers Crushers came out and crushed again beating KCCO 12-1 in week four. They controlled the game from start to finish and are looking ahead to week 5. They ll be short players this week. Will they have enough fire power to take down the Local Skanks? 2. Foot Clan Foot Clan decided to host another shut out party. This week their special guests were One Flip Two Cups. A blow out from the start, Foot Clan just had too much firepower for them to contend with. They ve got a couple of big games coming up over the next two weeks. Will they make it through unscathed? 3. Kick Tease said we can host shut out parties too!! They got one going against the Wasians and had a blast. They scored a ton and the Wasians scored none. They got Foot Clan on deck next week. Do you smell upset? 4. Duval Bang ems Was this shut out party week or what? Bang ems shut out Curls 12-0 improving to 4-0. Great start for this new team who has really only had one close game this season. They are playing well and could be that surprise team of the season. One Flip Two Cups is their challenger this week. Will they shut them down too? 5. Kickheads The Kickheads bounce back from the week three loss and improve to 2-2 with a win over Blurred Lines. Their schedule looks promising and this team should keep stacking up some wins in the near future. Watch out for them come playoff time. They ve got KCCO next week which should be a good matchup. Let s see if they are able to handle their business. 6. WAKA WAKA WAKA Strong squad keep pace with the league leaders with a 3-1 record. They ve beaten the teams they are supposed to beat and they loss one to the foot clan. We think they are better than the game they played against foot clan and they will have a chance to prove that soon enough. They ve got the undefeated SOFP this week. Will they handle their business? 7. Scorin on Fast Pitches They are off to a great start. This squad is definitely the Cinderella story of the season if we were to have one. A team that usually struggles winning games starts of undefeated. How will they finish? We have high hopes for this squad and really enjoy seeing them doing well. Keep it up!! 8. Wasted Talent No time or talent was Wasted for Wasted Talent to bounce back from the week 3 loss and get a win in week four against the Local Skanks. Great defense was played and they put some runs on em! This is the Wasted Talent we expect to see. Let s see how they finish the season. 9. Kick Calm and Chive on They did not Kick Calm in week four against the Dream Crushers and struggled to get the offense going. They did score late (of course it had to be Ben Huppertz) but they were pretty much shut down the rest of the game. They ve got a pretty good matchup against the kickheads this week. They will need to get the win if they plan to make a deep playoff run. 10. One Flip Two Cups They got trounced by the Foot Clan but hey they had a little fun out there anyway. They are still in a good spot for the season, sitting at 2-2 with a much lighter schedule on the horizon. If they can win out, they put themselves in a great position to make things happen come playoffs. 11. Fourth Base Bounce back and get a win against MSK and get themselves to 2-2 on the season. This squad is constantly improving and they should finish out pretty strong. They look good in Purple and sometimes call themselves the Purple People Eaters (I may have made that up). Be careful though because when they get hungry, they don t grab snickers, they grab wins. 12. Ballz Deep They got shut out by Scoring on Fast Pitches but we have a good feeling they will get back on track here soon and get some wins. Tough matchup against SOFP who is currently on a roll. Let s see how they fair against the winless Funky Buntlovin this week oz Curls This team did get beat pretty bad last week by the Bang ems but they have a win and they are improving. They are a new team that is picking up the strategy very quickly. Watch out for them come playoff time. They could be that team spoiling someone s playoff hopes. 14. Wasians They were shut out but wasians don t care. They have fun pre, post and during game time win or lose. This squad is a lot of fun and their pre game tailgates are the tits. They do need to get things in gear like we know they can and get some wins here soon. They can and will get it done. 15. Local Skanks Skanks are having a rough go at getting themselves reacquainted into the league. At least on the field. Off the field they are having a blast. They ll need to reach into that inner Skank firepower and start producing some runs before the season is lost. Let s see what they figure out! 16. Funky Buntlovin They are funky but maybe they love bunts a bit too much and are spending too much time looking at them instead of throwing people out. They ve had a tough start but we know they will get it going soon. Watch out for Buntlovin to start laying down some bunts to die for and throwing you and your bunts out while cruising to some late season wins. 17. Kicking it with Blurred Lines Blurred Lines!!! They are currently winless but there is plenty of time to turn things around. Will they get things together and do what it takes to start getting some wins? Everybody wants know!!! They ve got a battle of the winless this week against MSK..Who comes out on top? 18. Monty s Sore Knees The knees have got to be sore because they aren t winning the games as needed. They ve got a good matchup this week against Kicking it with Blurred Lines. Will they get their first win? Great job dressing up by this squad and has anyone seen them doing the Wobble yet? They are awesome at it!!!! *These are opinionated rankings that may or may not match true league standings. Please be assured that these rankings and comments are not personal, all in fun, and intended to increase your overall Kickball experience. Please see website ( for actual league standings.

7 THIS WEEK - Golf Pros and Tennis... WEEK 6 - Wig/Mustache Soiree Horror Movie Cast WINNER

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9 VETERAN OF THE WEEK Melissa Walls Kicking it with Blurred Lines How did you hear about WAKA? I heard about adult kickball from a friend so we Googled to find out if there was a league near us. Turns out there was so we signed up and have been playing ever since! How many seasons have you played? What teams? Any championships? This is my 5 th season. I played on Deez Balls, Prestige Worldwide, Kicks and Pitches, Waka the Way, and I am currently playing on Kickin it with Blurred Lines. Championships?? Does winning free beer from 1 st place at theme week count because last season, our team won 3 weeks in a row and I was theme queen as well. We may not score a lot on the field but we score in the bar!!! What do you think about your WAKA experience thus far? I absolutely love it. I have made so many friends and memories that I wouldn t trade for the world. Kickball nights are the best!!! It gives me something to look forward to after a long work week! Who are some of your favorite Athletes? Corey Myers and Nick Lysinger.they are my kickball heros!!! What did/do you want to be when you grew/grow up? Besides Frank Poncherello s wife from the TV show CHiPs? Let me get back to you on that one I m still trying to figure it out. Relationship Status? Currently accepting applications. SPOTLIGHTS What are some of your other hobbies besides kickball? Giving people pink eye, stealing prescriptions from the elderly, beating up the homeless and standing on chairs in the middle of a bar telling everyone what a winner I am. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Cinderella s Castle because who wouldn t want to live in the Happiest Place on Earth. If you won the Lotto this week, what would you do with all that money? I would travel the world. My dream has been to completely fill my passport and visit each of the Seven Wonders of the World. What was the last book you read? I just finished Reasons Mommy Drinks that I bought in the Chicago airport three weeks ago. It was flippin hilarious and includes 100 cocktail recipes so it s a win-win all around. What has been the most interesting Entertainment news to you within the past 12 months? Two things have actually puzzled me: How has Miley Cyrus not caught an airborne disease with as much as her tongue is out of her mouth? I just read a magazine article saying Kim Kardashian is almost back in her size 2 jeans again post baby Seriously? Am I the only one that thinks it is a medical mystery that her derrière can fit in any single digit size pair of jeans? What superpower would you want if you had a choice? To make my own Sharknados!

10 ROOKIE OF THE WEEK Sarah Alice Luffman Wasians How did you hear about WAKA? Well I had originally heard of this genius idea of Kegs and Kickball, down in Miami a few years back and then in September my roommate told me she had signed up for a kickball league here in Jacksonville. I immediately ed Corey and begged and pleaded for him to let me register, even though it was 3 weeks past registration deadline Here I stand, a proud Wasian What do you think about your WAKA experience thus far? It s great! For one, my team loves to tail gate before the games. One of our teammates, Chris plays a kickass 80 s and 90 s music mix during the games that I find myself dancing to. While I m competing for world s great performance of Don t Stop Believin, I m sure Marcel is cursing whoever dumped this crazy redhead on his team, but he s super nice about it. The After Party at Sneakers is a lot of fun as well. Unless you get screwed in Thunderstruck..Then it s not. What is your favorite pre-game/post-game activity? Pre-Game: Grilling brats while everyone repeatedly gives shit to the guy that dropped the ball in the previous games. It s a tough love. Post-Game: Cornhole Who are some of your favorite Athletes? Sexual Chocolate. Hands Down. What did/do you want to be when you grew/grow up? Professional Pogo Stick Champion. SPOTLIGHTS Relationship Status? Not Taken What are some of your other hobbies besides kickball? College Football, being a microbrew beer snob, The Edge Rock Gym, BEACH, and Sporting Clays! Oh, and RAM on Saturday mornings; Granola Folk bake the best goodies!! If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Italy! I ve been about 12 times and I ll go another 12 if I get the chance. If you won the Lotto this week, what would you do with all that money? Buy a tricked out villa in Italy, and then a soccer team. What was the last book you read? Kill Shot by Vince Flynn. If you re not obsessed with Mitch Rapp, you should be. What has been the most interesting Entertainment news to you within the past 12 months? Florida State took #2 in the BCS Rankings over Oregon! As a Florida Gators Alum I m not supposed to be happy about that but I AM! Go home PAC-12. I typically don t remember anything that happened more than 7 days ago Unless you re an OSU fan, because NEVER GETS OLD! What superpower would you want if you had a choice? Force Field and/or Force Manipulation! Something about a petite girl sending energy blasts from her hands seems freakin sweet.

11 BAR SPECIALS: $6 DOMESTIC PITCHERS $3 KICKBALL SHOTS